No, I'm not going to jump on the celebrity gossip train and talk about all the famous people in relationships right now. Quite frankly, none of it interests me.
In case you can't tell, I'm not one to heap a whole lot of praise on celebrities. In fact, I usually do just the opposite. I am not fond of famous people. And not because of jealousy. I would be perfectly fine with a celebrity out there who had some kind of common sense. Unfortunately, those types are extremely difficult to find.
Even for a person who typically avoids celebrity gossip and Ryan Seacrest, since his only purpose in life is to spread such gossip, I get bombarded by the stuff like everyone else. It is in the regular news headlines, and all over cyberspace. I apologize for adding to this crap, but trust me, I'm gonna make something out of it.
The only reason I'm writing about celebrities at all is to show people exactly why all of this drama unfolds in the world of the rich and famous. Much of it is due to the fact that people tend to change for the worse when they become famous. If you don't believe me, just read the biographies of a few celebs on Wikipedia and see what turns up. Fame destroys people. Plain and simple. There are a few rare exceptions (ex: Tim Tebow), but for the most part, fame is one of the greatest enemies a person can face. Fame is power. And power corrupts. Not to mention that it inflates a person's own self-image to the point where it is almost impossible for them to believe they aren't all-important.
Yes, I have a negative opinion of fame. And yet I have that secret urge, like many others, to become famous. Just what I would do with that fame is uncertain. I would hope that I could follow my heart as I always have and beat one of the greatest temptations in the history of mankind. But hey, I'll cover that more when I get there....
I'm sure everyone reading this is wondering... What does this have to do with relationships?
Well, I'm sure we've all heard the latest news in celebrity relationships. Katy Perry and Russel Brand are toast. Funny thing is, I saw that one coming from over a year away. Yup. I knew as soon as they got together that they would end. I'm not gonna sit here and call myself a psychic or anything, so don't think I'm trying to credit myself with anything here. Just about anyone can step up and say that they successfully predicted the downfall of a famous relationship.
The fact of the matter is, celebrities have the odds stacked against them when it comes to relationships. I'll give them that much. They basically have two options:
1: Go after someone famous.
2: Test the waters with unfamous people.
The first of which is almost always a terrible option. Obviously, this one depends on the people involved, but just about all celebrities tend to have pretty big egos. Putting together two people who both think they are ultimately important is never a good idea. But besides that, celebrities are constantly off doing things to make themselves more famous. That doesn't exactly amount to a whole lot of time being spent together. And aside from that, most celebrities also have a huge fan pool to chose from if they decide to go after someone else. And when you're famous, I'm sure the temptation is pretty high.
But unfamous people are hardly a good choice either. When you're famous, I'm sure it is really difficult to tell if anyone who lines up to date you is actually genuine, or whether they just want to be with you because well... you're famous. And besides that, a person unused to media attention might have a bit of a problem adjusting. So it isn't usually fair to either person.
The problem is, most celebrities choose the first option. And even more to that point, there is both a huge amount of diversity there, and at the same time, barely any at all. Sure, most celebs are hardly ordinary (picture Lady GaGa), but perhaps this is the problem. After all, extreme personalities usually never mesh well.
But an even bigger problem originates from the fact that many celebrities seem to enter relationships simply for publicity. These are the types of see-through relationships that really give love a bad name. Anyone remember Kim Kardashian? Yeah. That's what I'm talking about. I don't think this one needs any further explanation.
The biggest thing I'm trying to prove here is that, no matter what the media says, celebrity relationships are hardly realistic in any way. And yet, they are some of the most marketed news in the world.
Back to Katy Perry, she is one of the prime examples of a celebrity who is dead to what love truly is. My evidence of this comes from a concert she did just before entering her relationship with that brute Brand. She did a concert for her former high school. And during the performance, she called out a particular guy she supposedly had a crush on during her time in school. She essentially told him: "You sure made the right choice by not choosing me." What's the problem with a little old-school celeb revenge on the jerk that ignored her? Well, for starters, she obviously didn't do her research. The guy fell in love with and married his high-school sweetheart. I can't even bring myself to imagine why someone would choose fame over something as magical as an ending like that. And aside from that, just the fact that Katy seems to think that her fame suddenly makes her irresistible to guys like that is just absurd. I know I would choose the happy ending over fame in a heartbeat.
C'mon. A guy like Brand? That's her idea of a good relationship? Now, I don't know Russel personally, so I probably shouldn't pass judgement. But you get the idea.
I already went over much of this in a previous post, in which I slammed the whole "Journey debacle," in which one of Journey's band members engaged in an elaborate affair that left me sick every time I hear their song "Faithfully." This is the kind of stuff I'm talking about in celebrity relationships. And it is the kind of thing I'm sick of.
Now, earlier, I painted a picture of celebrities being stuck in a near-impossible situation when it comes to who to love. However, there is another way. As I've been preaching all along, perhaps what you're looking for is right beside you. Most people who are famous, weren't always that way. And celebrities, unless they REALLY let fame go to their heads, typically have a close group of friends that they still maintain contact with. These are the people you can trust.
Friday, January 6, 2012
Thursday, January 5, 2012
New Years Resolutions
Yes, it has been several days since New Years. Has everyone kept their resolutions so far?
Anyways, I made a few resolutions myself. I'm not going to share all of them, but there was one in particular that I was tested on right away.
Before I get into any of that, it is important for me to clear my beliefs when it comes to New Years resolutions. I definitely believe in making resolutions, though they shouldn't be forced. I don't write my resolutions out, and I don't plan them months ahead of time. I just think about things I could do better on over the next year. So, needless to say, I'm not exactly the most serious person when it comes to resolutions. But I'm not the type of person that thinks I have nothing that can be improved either.
With that said, one of my resolutions really stood out above the rest. I told myself that I needed to be much more straightforward with people.
That does seem a bit general, but anyone who talks with me on a consistent basis probably knows more specifically what I'm referring to. When a conversation turns toward secrets, or perhaps, something that has a risk of being offensive to one or both people involved, I have a tendency to become quite cryptic. This means that I begin to give very vague and coded answers to questions that people often want a direct answer to. Now, I'm not going to eliminate doing this entirely. I actually enjoy my ability to make people think for themselves. However, last year gave me a few opportunities to see places where it might have been better to give a more direct answer, and then back it up the way I do here on the blog.
Little did I expect this particular resolution to be tested so early.
In reality, the situation set itself up several days before I even made the resolution. I had sent a bulk text message to everyone on my contacts list (which actually created several awkward situations) wishing them a merry Christmas. A girl whom I have not talked to for some time responded. She is one of the girls whom I have mentioned in several previous posts, all from a while ago. She appeared in my blog previously as one of the girls who was helping me to lose faith in relationships and love in general. I had previously coached her in finding a true relationship, as she had found herself abandoned by her boyfriend, who had lost interest in her. From what I could gather about him, he was a jerk, and I simply gave her instructions on how to look deeper. But as mentioned before, all the advice I gave her seemed to fly right over her head, and she ended up falling for another guy based on nothing but a Facebook photo.
If you've read some of my previous posts, you probably know now which girl I'm referring to. Ironic as it may sound, those events were actually the inspiration for this resolution. I failed to give her my true opinion about how love based on a photo is just a quick path to heartbreak. Instead, I made my answers cryptic and it turns out, she never figured them out. By the time I told her about her mistake straight-up, she had already gone and made the mistake of pursuing this "love by photo."
After that, I had the idea for this resolution. It seems only fitting that she should be the one to put it to the test.
Anyways, I haven't talked to her in a long time. She went away to school and, as far as I can tell, went and got her old boyfriend back (the one who "got bored with her"), and is now living life exactly the way she told me she didn't want to. In light of all that, I really didn't want to talk to her anyways, as she seems to want to make all the wrong decisions, despite what I've tried to tell her.
This sudden text message changed all that. Suddenly, she was talking to me again. And like before, she was asking for advice on all of her problems. Just a day after New Years, I asked her if she was doing any better.
The tale that followed that question is one that I should probably keep to myself, as I'm not one to spill other people's secrets on the Internet. However, it involved her hanging out with some of her boyfriends pals, and them doing some not-so-acceptable things to her.
She continued on about how her boyfriend wasn't doing much about it, and how he didn't seem to care about it as much as she thought he should. Anyone else see what's coming?
Remembering my resolution, I told her exactly how I saw things. And I'll sum things up, because I did go on a bit of a rant. But what I said basically amounted to:
"With a guy like that, you're gonna get that kind of stuff. He's a bad person. Have you ever stopped to ask yourself WHY you love him? Sure, love does not always need a reason but... you're missing a whole half of the equation. That is, the part where he loves you back. There are people out there that would be willing to love you with every ounce of their being. And you're missing that. Sure, they are few and far between, but they're worth searching for. And trust me, you'll never find that kind of deeper love with him."
I never received a response.
Either way, I was proud of my ability, instead of getting all cryptic like I usually do, to stand up and tell it like it is. Despite the fact that she never answered me, and we haven't spoken since, I know I made her really think. And that is what mattered in the end.
So for those of you who know me, be cautious about what questions you ask me, unless you want the straight-up truth.
Anyways, I made a few resolutions myself. I'm not going to share all of them, but there was one in particular that I was tested on right away.
Before I get into any of that, it is important for me to clear my beliefs when it comes to New Years resolutions. I definitely believe in making resolutions, though they shouldn't be forced. I don't write my resolutions out, and I don't plan them months ahead of time. I just think about things I could do better on over the next year. So, needless to say, I'm not exactly the most serious person when it comes to resolutions. But I'm not the type of person that thinks I have nothing that can be improved either.
With that said, one of my resolutions really stood out above the rest. I told myself that I needed to be much more straightforward with people.
That does seem a bit general, but anyone who talks with me on a consistent basis probably knows more specifically what I'm referring to. When a conversation turns toward secrets, or perhaps, something that has a risk of being offensive to one or both people involved, I have a tendency to become quite cryptic. This means that I begin to give very vague and coded answers to questions that people often want a direct answer to. Now, I'm not going to eliminate doing this entirely. I actually enjoy my ability to make people think for themselves. However, last year gave me a few opportunities to see places where it might have been better to give a more direct answer, and then back it up the way I do here on the blog.
Little did I expect this particular resolution to be tested so early.
In reality, the situation set itself up several days before I even made the resolution. I had sent a bulk text message to everyone on my contacts list (which actually created several awkward situations) wishing them a merry Christmas. A girl whom I have not talked to for some time responded. She is one of the girls whom I have mentioned in several previous posts, all from a while ago. She appeared in my blog previously as one of the girls who was helping me to lose faith in relationships and love in general. I had previously coached her in finding a true relationship, as she had found herself abandoned by her boyfriend, who had lost interest in her. From what I could gather about him, he was a jerk, and I simply gave her instructions on how to look deeper. But as mentioned before, all the advice I gave her seemed to fly right over her head, and she ended up falling for another guy based on nothing but a Facebook photo.
If you've read some of my previous posts, you probably know now which girl I'm referring to. Ironic as it may sound, those events were actually the inspiration for this resolution. I failed to give her my true opinion about how love based on a photo is just a quick path to heartbreak. Instead, I made my answers cryptic and it turns out, she never figured them out. By the time I told her about her mistake straight-up, she had already gone and made the mistake of pursuing this "love by photo."
After that, I had the idea for this resolution. It seems only fitting that she should be the one to put it to the test.
Anyways, I haven't talked to her in a long time. She went away to school and, as far as I can tell, went and got her old boyfriend back (the one who "got bored with her"), and is now living life exactly the way she told me she didn't want to. In light of all that, I really didn't want to talk to her anyways, as she seems to want to make all the wrong decisions, despite what I've tried to tell her.
This sudden text message changed all that. Suddenly, she was talking to me again. And like before, she was asking for advice on all of her problems. Just a day after New Years, I asked her if she was doing any better.
The tale that followed that question is one that I should probably keep to myself, as I'm not one to spill other people's secrets on the Internet. However, it involved her hanging out with some of her boyfriends pals, and them doing some not-so-acceptable things to her.
She continued on about how her boyfriend wasn't doing much about it, and how he didn't seem to care about it as much as she thought he should. Anyone else see what's coming?
Remembering my resolution, I told her exactly how I saw things. And I'll sum things up, because I did go on a bit of a rant. But what I said basically amounted to:
"With a guy like that, you're gonna get that kind of stuff. He's a bad person. Have you ever stopped to ask yourself WHY you love him? Sure, love does not always need a reason but... you're missing a whole half of the equation. That is, the part where he loves you back. There are people out there that would be willing to love you with every ounce of their being. And you're missing that. Sure, they are few and far between, but they're worth searching for. And trust me, you'll never find that kind of deeper love with him."
I never received a response.
Either way, I was proud of my ability, instead of getting all cryptic like I usually do, to stand up and tell it like it is. Despite the fact that she never answered me, and we haven't spoken since, I know I made her really think. And that is what mattered in the end.
So for those of you who know me, be cautious about what questions you ask me, unless you want the straight-up truth.
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